Premature Autopsy: Summary Judgement on Half the Premier of "Alcatraz"


Thanks to the Fox marketing department and the fine folks at Frontier Airline, I got a chance to watch the first half of the two hour premiere of “Alcatraz” as I winged my way to Milwaukee a few days ago.

With the proviso that I haven’t seen the second hour and reserve the right to change my mind once I have, I thought I’d give y’all my initial impressions of the JJ Abrams produced drama.  Spoilers abound ahead. 

I swear I went in with the highest of hopes for “Alcatraz.” Love me some Jorge Garcia (and he is, unsurprisingly, the best thing about the first hour). I dig the hell out of “Lost” and “Fringe,” and the setting of Alcatraz Island is just a phenomenal place to center a TV series around.  Throw in the unsettling presence of Sam Neill and character actor extraordinaire Robert Forster and it should be a great mix of mystery and badassery.

So why did I finish that first episode with such a feeling of disappointment?


I suppose the most obvious culprit would be Sarah Jones, who plays our ostensible lead in Detective Rebecca Madsen.  JJ Abrams loves strong, beautiful women and has had a knack for finding capable actresses for his leads.  He is the guy who found Keri Russell, Jennifer Garner, Evangeline Lilly and Anna Torv, who took a little longer but eventually found her footing as the lead on “Fringe.” So it is entirely possible that Madsen will grow into a strong and compelling lead with a rich back story and distinct characterization, but by the end of the first hour, she feels like Torv-lite, a no nonsense law enforcement officer who is better than most of the men around her, bangs her co-worker/partner and gets sucked into a mystery bigger than she can comprehend.  The character is nothing we haven’t seen before, with some explicit daddy issues (another Abrams hallmark) to boot. Jones was the daughter of the charismatic white supremacist played by Adam Arkin in the sublime second season of “Sons of Anarchy.” While she was relegated as a minor but occasionally key player, she left a vastly deeper impression in her few scenes there, surrounded by formidable actors, than she does here, where she is the center of 80 percent of the episode.

Or maybe the problem is the premise? On paper, a ragtag group investigating the disappearance of 300+ people from Alcatraz in 1963 and their sudden reappearance in the hear and now, un-aged, sounds awesome, but if the premiere is any indication, it’s going to be a pretty rote procedural, where one of the convicts or guards reappears, commits a crime to get on our gangs radar, and then they have to hunt him down before he kills again.  There will be variations, no doubt. I am sure the prison guards that appear will be less prone to murder than the prisoners. They might even get sent back in small groups!

The question “Alcatraz” wants us to ask is “Where did they go?” “Who took them?” and “Why are they coming back now?” But the question I kept asking was “Why would anyone go to all that trouble?” In the premiere, our con of the week, Jack Sylvane, comes back, kills the former Deputy Warden who fucked him over back in the 60s, THEN goes and kills some cops in pursuit of a little black pouch in some rich guy’s safe, and THEN goes after his brother, who married his ex-wife while he was in the pen. Ignoring the fact that the order makes no sense (Why take care of personal business before AND after getting the mystery pouch? Is the pouch more important than killing your brother, but less important than killing the warden?), this is not the sort of mission that requires time-traveling ex-cons. Alcatraz supposedly held the baddest of the bad guys, but all Sylvane does on his “mission” is point a gun and demand the guy open the safe. No doubt there is a richer mythology at play here, and a grander scheme than the pilot can reveal, but was it worth removing three hundred people from the space-time continuum, resulting in a massive government cover up, for some smash and grab armed robbery?

And let’s talk about that government cover up for a moment, shall we? After the disappearance of all of the inmates, the show tells us that documents were forged suggesting everyone was transferred to other prisons, where more documents were forged that said they all eventually died in jail. In the mean time, the FBI has set up a super secret task force to investigate this disappearance (complete with an impressively lit office on Alcatraz Island).  I don’t mind that the task force seems to be just Sam Neill and Parminder Nagra (of “Bend it Like Beckham” and “ER,” here underserved as the super-competent office gal).  After nearly 50 years, the government wouldn’t spare a lot of people to sit around just WAITING.  But why does Neill seem so READY? Again, there is more at play than is revealed in the first half of the premiere, but the fact that Neill has been sitting around for close to five decades just waiting for something to happen, and as soon as it does he has a complete infrastructure in place to deal with everything? A fully staffed and detailed replica of the Alcatraz cell block? Everyone was just hanging out, shooting pool and playing cards, and then WHAM! Time-traveling convicts are back! Get into military formation!

I know that is nitpicky, but a show like “Alcatraz,” just like “Fringe” and “Lost” before it, lives or dies on its ability to create a world. That world needs rules and it needs consistency.  Actions need to make sense in the context of that world.  Again (and I know I keep saying this, but it bears repeating), I only saw half of what is premiering, and there is certainly a deeper rabbit hole to fall into as the show continues, but it already feels like it is plotted in a way that relies heavily on narrative convenience. Our heroes are one step behind Jack Sylvane from the outset.  A desk clerk at a bath house is accosted by a lean man in his thirties with dark hair? Show him a picture of Jack, because that is the only explanation for someone in the city of San Francisco getting beat up.   The first hour of “Alcatraz” was nothing but thinly drawn characters obeying the whims of writers.

That’s not to say there is nothing to recommend the show. As I said above, Jorge Garcia is a lot of fun as an Alcatraz expert who gets drafted into service by Detective Madsen, and his understated elation is great as he gets to dive into a mystery based on his greatest passion.  No one on TV can get as big a laugh as Garcia by just looking at someone talking, and he gets several in the pilot as he learns that there is so much more beneath the surface of his favorite subject.  I don’t know how long that can last, and it’s hard to believe that Garcia’s character, to be useful to the team, knows significantly more than Niell, who, again, has been preparing for this for fifty years, but for now, he proves a nice break from the over-serious bleakness of the rest of the episode.

Sam Niell is sufficient as Emerson Hauser, although he hams it up a bit when the script asks him to convey that he knows more than he is saying, all arched eyebrows and self-satisfied smirk.  The end of the episode treats it as a big reveal that he was a new guard who happened to be away from the prison when everyone disappeared from Alcatraz, but it lands with a thud, especially when you do the math and realize that he would have to be about 70, well past retirement age for the FBI, for that to work.

The other cast member of note is Robert Forster, who isn’t given much to do as Detective Madsen’s uncle and former Alcatraz guard (he left before the disappearance).  Like everyone on an Abrams show, he’s obviously not telling all that he knows, but Forster is such a great presence on screen that it amazes me he hasn’t been tapped for series work before.  He exudes a quite machismo that Neill lacks, and I hope he gets incorporated into the main storylines going forward as more than a source for anecdotes and inside information about the prison.

The show hits a lot of ridiculous beats, like there being a file room still full of old prisoner’s stuff on Alcatraz, even though the whole island is now a tourist trap, or Madsen walking through the men’s locker room to give a message to her boyfriend and kiss him goodbye, but I think the one that disappointed me the most was towards the end, when Madsen is officially brought onto the Alcatraz Investigations team and is told she can’t tell anyone about it, EVER.  The “double life” storyline has been done to death, and I have no doubt that this show is going to go the route of her lying to her live-in boyfriend and being caught in a contradiction or denial, or constantly asking him “Trust me.” It’s a hoary trope to roll out, even on a show where everyone seems to be hiding SOMETHING (Except Garcia.  I’ve never seen him play anything but guileless).

And that about sums up the show right there.  Little we haven’t seen before, but gussied up with the promise of Alcatraz.  I wish Frontier Air had managed to get the second hour of the premiere as well.  Not just because it was a long flight and my laptop doesn’t hold much of a battery charge any more, but because the thing the first episode left me wondering, more than any of the mysteries it presents, is “What will they do in the second hour to get people excited?” because this warmed over episode of “Law and Order: Special Prisoner’s Unit” ain’t gonna get it done.

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